TEASER
FADE IN:
INT. GARRETON ACADEMY - CLASSROOM - DAY
A marker pen moves across a white-board, writing a word in
big letters. The writer turns around.
It's MR. PARKER. He smiles confidently at his bored class.
MR. PARKER
Okay! This year we've been
studying plays like "The
Crucible" and "Othello". Can
anyone tell me what these two
fine works of fiction have in
common?
Beat.
RANDOM STUDENT
They both suck.
MR. PARKER
Exactly! They both contain
characters that are involved in
sucky relationships and those
fantastic emotions like jealousy,
lust and hate.
He walks over to his desk and the camera reveals the word
on the board: RELATIONSHIPS.
He pulls open a drawer but stops to address the class.
MR. PARKER (CONT'D)
For example, Othello is so
jealous of Desdemona's supposed
relationship with Cassio that he
goes so far as to murder her. In
"The Crucible", Abigail still
lusts after John Proctor even
after his wife caught them in an
affair. Do you want to know where
I'm going with all of this?
He pulls out some papers.
MR. PARKER (CONT'D)
I'm doing a neat little segue
into telling you that you have an
assignment!
There's a collective GROAN from the class as the camera
pans around and finds VI MORGAN sitting at a desk.
She's resting her head on her hand - looking as if she is
going to fall asleep any moment now.
FADE TO:
INT. THE COMPANY - CONFERENCE ROOM - DAY
Vi is seated in the exact same position - still in her
school uniform.
ALISTAIR BENSON sits at the head of the table.
BENSON
Miss Morgan?
She snaps alive.
VI
Hmm?
BENSON
Did you pay any attention to what
I just said?
VI
Something about trance music?
He raises an eyebrow.
BENSON
I was discussing work ethic and
how it can improve yourself as a
person.
VI
Does the ethic include regular
sleep patterns?
BENSON
It will knock you out with a
hammer.
Beat.
VI
What?
BENSON
It's an extended metaphor.
Vi still looks lost.
BENSON (CONT'D)
To earn the rest you have to
work.
VI
You mean "no pain, no gain?"
BENSON
(shrugs)
If you will.
He pulls out a piece of paper and hands it to her.
VI
(sighs; sarcastically)
What whacky adventure will our
sexy and sassy heroine find
herself on this week?
No reaction from Benson and:
FADE TO:
INT. GARRETON ACADEMY - CLASSROOM - DAY
Mr. Parker hands the papers out to the sluggish class.
MR. PARKER
Alright, I want you all to write
an essay on why you think
relationships between characters
in fiction are prone to, as Adam
so intellectually described it,
"suck."
He reaches Vi, and she takes the paper from him.
MR. PARKER (CONT'D)
Now, those with hearing might've
actually caught the answer in my
opening speech, but you are going
to have to research. That means
outside sources - no Spark-Notes
and no essays from older siblings
who did this last year.
(beat)
Oh - and you'll be working in
pairs.
The class CHEERS.
MR. PARKER (CONT'D)
Which I will assign.
The class GROANS as he heads back to the table.
MR. PARKER (CONT'D)
Okay. Observant Adam can work
with Shane.
Vi glances over to give SHANE EVANS a little smile.
MR. PARKER (CONT'D)
Violet.
She turns to her teacher, suddenly feeling a bitter dread
come along the back of her spine.
MR. PARKER (CONT'D)
(reads)
You can work with - -
(glances around)
- - Bianca.
Vi freezes and turns to see BIANCA PARRY staring at her
with the same disgusted expression.
They turn away in unison.
VI
(sighs)
Great.
(beat)
No way am I doing this all by
myself.
She slouches down and:
CUT TO:
INT. THE COMPANY - CONFERENCE ROOM - DAY
CLOSE UP ON PAPER - -
"DO SCHOOL ASSIGNMENT YOURSELF."
VI
(sighs)
Huh.
She drops the paper and walks off.
VI (O.S.) (CONT'D)
So much for work ethic.
All Benson does is raise an eyebrow and:
CUT TO BLACK.
END OF TEASER
ACT ONE
FADE IN:
INT. THE COMPANY - RECEPTION - MOMENTS LATER
Vi walks out to ANDREW FRIAR, seated on some comfortable
seats next to a window which shows a busy industrial
estate.
He leaps to his feet with a forced smile.
ANDREW
So what whackiness is our
glamorous heroine going to do
this week?
VI
Homework.
ANDREW
(smiles)
Funny.
They begin to walk towards the elevator.
VI
Seriously. My Company assignment
is my English Assignment.
Andrew stops.
ANDREW
Do you hear that?
VI
Hear what?
ANDREW
The sound of Hell freezing over.
Something that actually sounds
easy.
Andrew pushes the button on the elevator.
ANDREW (CONT'D)
This is probably the easiest
assignment that you've had, kid.
So enjoy it.
The doors open.
VI
But it's a group project that I
now have to do alone.
She walks in - -
- - and Andrew doesn't follow her.
VI (CONT'D)
(huh?)
Hey!
ANDREW
(smiling)
This means I have time off! Ha!
Good luck.
The doors begin to CLOSE as Vi looks confused - -
VI
Hey just wait a - -
- - the doors CLOSE.
Andrew turns around and takes a deep breath, wearing a grin
on his face.
ANDREW
Okay.
The grin fades.
ANDREW (CONT'D)
(sighs)
Bored already.
He heads off frame and:
CUT TO:
INT. GARRETON ACADEMY - HALLWAY - NEXT AFTERNOON
The BELL RINGS in the background as Vi and Shane walk down
the corridor. Vi is carrying some books in her arms - and
looking around, trying to spot someone.
SHANE
I knew I should've given Adam
directions to the Library.
(sighs)
You know he asked me if there's
special equipment needed to plug
into the TV to play books.
Vi laughs.
SHANE (CONT'D)
Speaking of classmates from Hell,
where's Bianca?
VI
I just made an educated guess
that she wouldn't mind if I did
this myself.
They stand outside the library.
VI (CONT'D)
So... You've been in here before?
SHANE
(nods)
Once or twice. The guy in charge
is extremely creepy.
VI
Creepy as in always-speaks-with
serial-killer-double-meanings
creepy or needs-to-get-out-more?
SHANE
If he gets out more he could find
his first victim.
BIANCA (O.S.)
This place?
Vi turns her sharply and her books fall out of her hands.
One of them stubs Bianca's shoes.
BIANCA (CONT'D)
OW!
(winces)
These are expensive.
VI
The toes or the shoes?
Vi picks up the fallen books. As she stands...
VI (CONT'D)
What are you doing here?
BIANCA
Uh, the assignment? I actually
want to do well in this thing.
Shocker.
VI
(uh-oh)
You do?
BIANCA
Yeah. Besides, if I'm not here
you're bound to make some stupid
mistake that'll fail us both.
She walks forward and through the doors into the school
library.
Vi just sighs and dies a little as Shane offers a small
amount of pity in his expression.
SHANE
I'll catch up. I'm going on a
trek through the wilderness to
find Adam.
VI
You can't leave me alone!
He turns and sighs.
SHANE
Try to stand still a lot. Their
vision is based on movement.
He waves her off, leaving Vi to breath a dark sigh and then
walk through the doors in front of her into:
INT. GARRETON ACADEMY - LIBRARY - CONTINUOUS
It's all one level, and Bianca's begrudgingly sat on an
empty table.
Vi sits down and places the books in front of her.
VI
(sighs)
Right. Relationships in
literature. Why do they suck?
BIANCA
I dunno.
VI
I was being rhetorical.
BIANCA
So was I.
Tough crowd.
VI
Okay.
(beat)
I've been thinking and I've
already chosen some interesting
relationships - -
BIANCA
- - You've already started?
VI
(beat; glancing away)
I may have.
Bianca just breathes out sharply. Annoyed.
BIANCA
You're not dragging me down to
your level of intellect.
VI
Huh - what - what? I'm smarter
than you!
BIANCA
Ha! Are not.
VI
I am so.
BIANCA
(leaning forward)
Here's me wanting to actually do
the work and - -
She stops, glances behind Vi and leans back, shaking her
head.
She's looking at ERIN FOWLER who looks slightly nervous.
ERIN
(smiles)
Bianca.
(notices Vi)
Vi.
BIANCA
Erin.
VI
(under her breath)
Brad. Janet. Dr Scott.
Long awkward silence.
BIANCA
Do you want something? My
intellect's fading the longer I'm
in my current company.
ERIN
Actually I - uh -
(glances at Vi)
- I just wanted to - um...well,
talk to you about something.
BIANCA
What?
ERIN
Can we...uh -
(glances at Vi, again)
- head out -
BIANCA
(interrupting)
Not now, Erin. I'm busy.
He looks a bit defeated.
ERIN
Oh. Okay - I'll see you later,
then.
He walks off leaving Vi to roll her eyes and open a book in
front of her.
VI
(moving on)
Okay - sucky relationships.
BIANCA
Oh screw you!
VI
Pardon?
BIANCA
You're in no position to comment
on mine and Erin's relationship.
VI
I wasn't commenting on your
relationship!
BIANCA
Whatever.
SHANE (O.S.)
Hey Vi!
Shane walks past with ADAM - the kid from the teaser. Vi
flashes a wave before turning back to see Bianca shaking
her head.
BIANCA
You know what? I can't believe
I'm actually going to say this
without heaving but - is there
some place we can go without
distraction?
Thump. Vi's hit with a strange sense of "what?" She looks
around, trying to think of something when a small sign
above a bookcase catches her eye. It reads, "Home".
VI
(confused)
Home?
BIANCA
What?
VI
Home. Err - my house.
BIANCA
And I'm going to even step in the
same street as that because?
ADAM (O.S.)
Wow - I've never seen this many
books before!
BIANCA
I'm going to the bathroom. I'm
about to vomit my answer.
With a deep breath she stands and walks past Vi.
VI
Was that a yes?
She gets a scowl in a reply before Bianca storms off.
VI (CONT'D)
Oh crap that was a yes.
She slaps herself in the forehead with her palm.
VI (CONT'D)
Ow.
CUT TO:
INT. MORGAN RESIDENCE - FRONT HALL - LATER
The front door opens and Vi enters.
Following her, Bianca walks through and glances around the
house, giving it the once over. She doesn't look impressed.
BIANCA
My pool house is bigger.
PETER (O.S.)
Vi? That you?
VI
Yes Dad!
PETER (O.S.)
You've got a friend over?
The girls glance at each other.
VI
Define friend?
There's the sound of hurried footsteps as CAM MORGAN comes
down the stairs - stopping when he sees Vi and Bianca.
VI (CONT'D)
Hi, Cam.
He tilts his head, looking at Bianca. She takes a step back
as if he'd bite.
CAM
Shane's changed.
VI
(sighs)
Yes, Cam?
CAM
You can't watch TV for another - -
(checks watch)
- - forty two and a... half
minutes. I'm recording something.
VI
What?
CAM
It's about what bacteria helps
bodies decompose.
BIANCA
How completely not strange and
freakish.
Cam scampers off into the kitchen whilst Vi gives Bianca a
sharp look.
VI
We can work on the kitchen table.
BIANCA
Is it clean?
VI
Do you want a tire iron to your
head?
She walks into:
INT. MORGAN RESIDENCE - KITCHEN - CONTINUOUS
And heads to the kitchen table - placing her bag and books
on the table. She glances to see Bianca walk in, looking
around as if it's infected.
She sees PETER MORGAN on the kitchen counter with a note
pad.
PETER
Hello girls.
VI
Hi Dad.
(re: Note pad)
What are you doing?
PETER
Finally managed to get a grasp on
my latest book. I'll leave you
two alone in a second just...
VI
(cautious)
Yeah?
PETER
Can you take a piano landing on
someone's head seriously?
VI
Grand piano?
PETER
Hmm...
He exits, carrying the note pad with him.
BIANCA
Again, not strange and freakish
at all.
VI
Are you going to keep insulting
my family? Because you can just
leave now if you are going to
insult.
BIANCA
You're not failing this project.
VI
(to herself)
Damn.
She sits on the kitchen table and takes an A4 pad of lined
paper out.
VI (CONT'D)
Right. Lets work on this.
(beat)
Together.
It's clear that neither of them want to be here.
PENNY (O.S.)
The good one's home!
PENNY MORGAN walks into the kitchen from the back door,
heading to the fridge.
PETER (O.S.)
How was your day, Penn?
PENNY
(calling out)
I was asked out a total of three
times by some losers in Vi's
year! Where is freakazoid anyway?
She grabs a bottle of water from the fridge and opens it,
taking a quick sip. She then acknowledges Vi.
PENNY (CONT'D)
Oh, you're already here.
VI
You did that on purpose.
Bianca turns around. Penny cocks an eyebrow towards Bianca.
PENNY
Shane's changed.
BIANCA
I've gotten that a lot recently.
PENNY
Bianca, right?
BIANCA
Yeah.
PENNY
Some advice? Run.
BIANCA
Planning on it - but Parker
forced us together.
Penny gives a sympathetic sigh towards her.
PENNY
(sympathetic)
Ahh. Little tip, if she starts to
get on your nerves - hit her with
something. It usually works.
Penny heads out of the kitchen.
BIANCA
Was she adopted?
VI
I wish.
There's an odd silence.
VI (CONT'D)
Right.
She glances towards the fridge - where letters are now
spelling out "LIBRARY."
Vi stares for a moment, slightly confused.
BIANCA
Look - are we going to do this or
what?
Vi stands for a moment, and idea forming in her head as she
suddenly grabs her bag and puts some of the books in the
bag.
VI
(thinks)
I've just got to... go.
(beat)
I'll be right back.
She storms out of the kitchen leaving Bianca sitting there,
shaking her head in disbelief.
BIANCA
She's nuts. Complete nuts.
PETER (O.S.)
PENNY! CAM'S TAPING SOMETHING!
PENNY (O.S.)
FINE!
Penny storms in from the living room, shaking her head. She
SLAMS the bottle of water on the kitchen table.
PENNY (CONT'D)
(to Bianca)
This family is psychotic.
BIANCA
I'm getting that feeling.
Penny sits down in Vi's empty chair.
PENNY
I'm the only normal one, you
know. Well, my Mum isn't too bad.
Overprotective and stuff but
she's not... insane-insane like
the rest of them.
BIANCA
How do you stand it?
PENNY
A whole lot of repression and
frequent nights out clubbing.
It's the only cure, really.
Bianca nods in agreement. Cam enters.
CAM
You guys have to see this! They
put a tiny camera inside of a
dead pig and they're showing the
decomposition in fast forward!
Bianca and Penny share a disgusted look. Simultaneously
they both stand and exit.
Cam drops his head.
CAM (CONT'D)
No one appreciates the small
things in life.
He walks back into the living room.
CUT TO BLACK.
END OF ACT ONE
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